New year... New baby!

At approximately 20 weeks along, we’ve reached the halfway marker. Since becoming pregnant, I’ve found the whole timing of this to be somewhat perplexing. I keep redoing the math in my head, and am still unsure why people refer to pregnancy as a nine month term. In pregnancy land, everything is weeks. 40 weeks is a full term. The first two weeks, actually don’t count, because those two weeks are including simply because the egg is ready and waiting… it hasn’t been fertilized, and so technically you’re not ‘pregnant’ even though a waiting egg is still an important part of this whole process.

Still, subtracting that 2 from 40, you’re left with 38, which is really about 9 and a half months, a whole ten if you include those first couple bogus weeks when you are still waiting to get laid (forgive my crass humor). So, I suppose 9 is just a rounded number for those of us who think counting to forty is too much work.

Every time someone asks me how many months, I get to do this neat little math problem in my head. I subtract two from the number of weeks, then divide the remaining number by four. Then I kind of round it out. Ok, so now I’m four and half months along, but I still have five months to go to get to May, and oh yeah, since my due date is the 15^th, I have two weeks.. so really it’s five and half months. But wait.. that’s still ten months. Are the doctors doing a different math problem when they do the ultrasound? After all, they are the ones that clocked me at 19 weeks last time I was there, then pronounced I was at the halfway marker, which I would assume means they are referring to gestational age. So what the hell? Why is this so hard to do one simple conversion. Somewhere, someone got a few lines crossed, and/or was never entirely clear with me. To make matters worse, every time I think of the baby’s age I ponder this, and since I have no precise answer, I’m starting to get annoyed. So I got to site that actually breaks it down for me. According to this site, which divides the weeks up in occasional groupings of five (they average a month at 4.445 weeks) I’m in month five! WTH? Really? Ugh.. I’ll have to pass this question on to my nurse. I don’t understand why  this isn’t more simple. Who the hell decided to make a math problem as hard as doing your taxes for pregnant women… was it to annoy the heck out of us? To test our mental capabilities or keep us in check (after all, we all know that sooner or later baby brain kicks in). Ugh…

The most common weeks to months breakdown used for the 9 months of pregnancy:
*This is just a guideline and the exact weekly breakdown may differ from source to source. (from baby2see.com)

Your First Trimester:
1^st Month = Weeks 1,2,3,4
2^nd Month = Weeks 5,6,7,8
3^rd Month = Weeks 9,10,11,12,13
Your Second Trimester:
4^th Month = Wks 14,15,16,17
5^th Month = Wks 18,19,20,21
6^th Month = Wks 22,23,24,25,26
Your Third Trimester:
7^th Month = Wks 27,28,29,30
8^th Month = Wks 31,32,33,34,35
9^th Month = Wks 36,37,38,39,40

Ahhh, so now I see. By adding an additional week to the ends of each trimester, you have months with approximately five weeks instead of the traditional four. Strange.

Ok.. now that I have successfully solved that riddle (all done while in the process of writing about it, no less) I can continue on in peace.

I had a nice, quiet Christmas. Vincent was working, and so I sat around most of the day, cooking and doing a small amount of organizing. For some strange reason I was unhappy, perhaps because all of the stress I had become so addicted to as far as building up to the holiday was suddenly alleviated, and so quickly I could hardly cope. I’m not sure what I expected, but I was in a sentimental, disgruntled mood. It’s odd, thinking that next year I’ll have someone else to shop for. Oh, don’t get me wrong, first year, I’m certain he will be so amazed by the wrapping paper alone I won’t need to buy him anything extravagant. I could probably buy at least one package of diapers and he wouldn’t know the difference. Truth be told, I’ve never been a supporter of parents who want to make that first birthday “unforgettable,” or for that matter, the birthday after that. Let’s be honest, the first unforgettable holiday, is more for mom and dad then it is for the baby, who won’t remember anything but what really counts. Oh, and I suppose you want to know what it is I think that really counts? Why, the shiny colors naturally! The spirit of the holiday, the joy you emanate from it is what the baby will pick up on. For that matter, who wants to get in the habit of spoiling a child who won’t have any real appreciation for what he/she is getting? So yes, there will be those special, little toys, I will just have to have, but it’s so important to try and find a good balance, and I can only hope I’m on the right path.

Speaking of the right path, I’m headed into the new year. Vincent calls me lame, but my resolutions are pretty typical. I want to curse less, speak more appropriately. I also want to really focus on baby buying. Once again, I stress that I don’t want to spend money frivolously, but there’s quite a bit to consider. First, being at the halfway mark, I’m not guaranteed that the baby won’t come early, even if it’s just by two weeks, which means I want to get some preparation in. Secondly, even if money is a little short, I don’t want to have to settle for everything. Just because I get some hand me down clothes doesn’t mean I should have to stick my poor child in some atrocious purple outfit. I shouldn’t have to lower all my standards. It’s like a wedding. You may not want to spend 50,000 dollars on a dress, but you don’t want the clearance sale at Wal-mart out of desperation either. With that in mind, and the major holidays over, time to get started. I want to make at least one major buy (car seat, stroller, crib) every month. That’s not very much time if you think about it, so I may even have to squeeze in a couple in one month, not to mention scattering as much little stuff as I can around all that (I ordered a couple of pacifiers already.. cute!).

One thing I have been seriously considering is giving the old cloth diapers a go. At least, in the beginning, while he’s not really got poops (they say that doesn’t really start til you switch over to solids), it’ll give me an idea of whether or not I can handle that kind of work, plus if we chose the right brand it’ll save us quite a bit of money. I especially liked my friend’s idea to compromise. She uses cloth diapers at home since she’s there so much, but disposables while she’s out. The startup fee is quite a bit heavy, but in the long run it would pay off, just like using breast milk over formula is a definite must (as long as he takes to it!). No reason to go out and pay for something my body is producing… and it will help me drop weight!

Unfortunately, I don’t quite understand all of Vincent’s thoughts. The most I can typically get out of him is a joke here and there, a small remark, or, “we’ll have to see.” All of which basically means he really hasn’t put a lot of thought into it. I can’t blame him though. He has his car which he is trying to get worked on, and unlike my own job which is fairly lenient with it’s down time, he’s always focused, so he doesn’t have all the time to consider these options like I do. Still, I feel somewhat bad, like maybe I’m denying him part of the process of decision making or will come off seeming bossy. I’m just used to making decisions on my own, and it’s not in my nature to wait around until the last minute to research something if I have the time now. Plus, I don’t want to nag him into it, because then the whole process will be just as frustrating for him, when I figure if he trusts me I can do most of the work really. Anyways, I can (and will have to) nag him about other things, besides diapers, like the car seats, cribs, things that demand quality but that should be aesthetically pleasing for a boy and his dad as well as me.

Meanwhile, on the lighter side of things, supposedly Cesar (if that remains his name… I think it should!) can hear me and the outside world about now, even though the internal sounds have been described as being “louder than a vacuum cleaner.” For that reason, I encourage Vincent to say something here and there, because I want so very much for Cesar to understand our tones! Also, he’s swallowing lots of fluid to practice digestion, and the amniotic fluid is said to taste differently depending on what I eat. How interesting! I never knew that. This means I should eat a nice variety of healthy foods so he’ll take a liking to them. I’m so grateful the holidays are over because I really pigged out on candy, so now I can get back on track, and get Cesar interesting in healthy foods.

One of my friends described to me “candy” for her children as being fruit, which I thought was interesting. They are too young to actually learn the error, but she sticks with it.

Oh the things to think about. I get excited, and then occasionally anxious. I sometimes think I can’t do this. I hear that’s a natural fear, and so I ignore it. After all, if I can’t do this, well really, what option do I have? Of course I can. If some of these other parents I’ve seen can do it, I can, even if my standards are a little high!

Above: My Christmas photo, I suppose. I actually got a camera for Christmas, and even though I can't stand cameras, I figure that I can be in control of all the shots! Nice.
Below: Vincent, procrastination at it's best. What can I say, he makes me laugh.